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‘Wild Mountain Thyme’ review: Stale/irritating romance falls flat

An hour and forty minutes of laughably dumb schmaltz.

I like Emily Blunt a lot. She’s quite the talented actress, but goodness she needed to take another look at this laughable script before signing onto Wild Mountain Thyme. I didn’t really know what to expect going into this, all I knew was that it starred Emily Blunt and took place in scenic Ireland. I’m super glad that this did take place in Ireland because at least we have something pretty to look while all this crap is taking place. This film is simply insufferable and that’s due to it’s bad script and irritating characters.

As I said, I really like Emily Blunt, she’s a talented actress that has given very skilled performances in her past films. Unfortunately, in Wild Mountain Thyme Blunt is playing a character that’s just annoying and unlikable and even worse, she’s in a story that’s stale and comically cheesy. She does what she can with her performance but I don’t think any actress could’ve broken through this awful script.

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As for Blunt’s love interest Jamie Dornan, I’m sorry but oh my god I could not stand him in this! Now I want to be clear, this failure is not completely on Dornan. His character is poorly written and aggressively bland. And while Dornan’s acting is better here than it was in the abysmal Fifty Shades films, he still seems kind of flat a lot of the time. I mean he’s certainly very handsome but I just don’t feel anything from his performance.

I felt a whole lot more from both Christopher Walken and Jon Hamm. Their performances provide some minor relief simply because they are able to inject a tiny bit of life into this thing. Christopher Walken doesn’t have a whole lot of screen time but what time he does have he uses well. The same goes for Hamm, while he’s not in a leading role here, he turns on his signature charm and is amusing to watch.

'Wild Mountain Thyme' review: Stale/irritating romance falls flat
Emily Blunt and Jamie Dornan

The schmaltz and cheesiness is THICK with this Wild Mountain Thyme. No part of this “romance” between these two main characters feels real or authentic. A lot of this feels like a parody of a romance, like we’re supposed to laugh at this and not actually take it seriously. The dialogue is so contrived and fake that it really is impossible to feel anything. I love good romance films – one of my favorite films ever is Bridges of Madison County that was a romance that actually had a story that felt real and had characters that weren’t fake and annoying.

And while there isn’t anything inherently wrong with being a little predictable, when the script is this weak, a film’s predictability becomes highlighted. I knew what the destination was in Wild Mountain Thyme and I just wanted them to get there already so I wouldn’t have to spend any more time in these annoying people’s stale love story. And speaking of stale, that’s a good adjective for the chemistry between Blunt and Dornan. I never got why they loved each other and I never felt that feeling of wanting them to end up together.

I haven’t seen a romance film this painful and fake in quite some time, there’s just no emotional resonance in any of this. Oh and the ending is just cringe worthy, I mean most of Wild Mountain Thyme is cringe worthy but there is a moment at the end that is just exceedingly dumb. I said to myself: oh my god… why… WHY is this so stupid?! There are some films that are “so bad it’s good” but I don’t think this one fits that bill because there’s just no real enjoyment that comes out of this. So yes, Christopher Walken and Jon Hamm are kind of nice to watch during their minimal screen time but everything else here is just painfully dumb and irritating.

'Wild Mountain Thyme' review: Stale/irritating romance falls flat
Emily Blunt and Jon Hamm

Wild Mountain Thyme is an hour and forty minutes of laughably dumb schmaltz. The characters aren’t likable and the “romance” is as fake and stale as can be. Do yourself a favor: leave this alone and rent a GOOD romance.

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wild mountain thyme
‘Wild Mountain Thyme’ review: Stale/irritating romance falls flat
Wild Mountain Thyme
Wild Mountain Thyme is a failure due to it's painfully dumb script, a complete lack of chemistry between it's two leads, and Jamie Dornan's mostly flat performance.
Reader Rating0 Votes
0
Christopher Walken
Jon Hamm
Laughably dumb script
Jamie Dornan
Complete lack of chemistry between Blunt and Dornan
3
Meh

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