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The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With Spidey

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The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With Spidey

Anyone who’s ever used Tinder or any of the other apps designed to connect two total strangers knows how quickly conversations can go south. Fortunately, Marvel Comics’ new chatbot, produced in association with Conversable Inc., isn’t designed to hook readers up with their favorite superheroes.

So why then, did my conversation with Spider-Man take such an ugly turn? I love this guy – I mean, I did! Was it something I said, or was it all him? Maybe he’s just under a lot of stress right now. I DON’T KNOW!

Rather than writing about this in my journal, I figured I’d share screenshots of my conversation with Spider-Man with AiPT!’s wonderful audience. Because, I’m mature like that.

First, HE messaged ME!The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyI always thought Spidey was really clever, but some of those nickname suggestions … Captain Taco? Either way, I was willing to look past the names and get down to business.The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThis is where it got weird.The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyHe wanted to know where I was. Like, I knew OF HIM, but I didn’t really KNOW HIM yet, you know? So I think I got a little passive-aggressive as a result…The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyI feel like I was asking very reasonable questions. THEN…
The Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideyThe Passive-Aggressive Spider-Man: My Text Fight With SpideySo, there you have it. I dunno, it got ugly fast. Like, I know Spider-Man has a reputation for talking to himself a lot, but I expect a little more interest in what I have to say. I get that he’s dealing with the Army of Evil, but what about what’s going on in MY life?

What do you all think? Should I talk to Spidey one more time and try to sort this out, or just move on? Maybe I should have just agreed to letting him call me Thunder Clapper.

UGH!!!

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