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Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'

Comic Books

Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin’


Divinity #2


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
By Matt Kindt and Trevor Hairsine

Nick: You know the spark is gone when the creepy spaceman watching you in bed is getting bored with the show.

Listen to the latest episode of our weekly comics podcast!

Dave: I think I’m getting a headache just reading this.

Dog: The High Evolutionary ponders, “Am I attracted to Dolph Lundgren in drag? It’s so lonely on Counter Earth.”

John: His loss. My gain. Now get this over with so I can bring the moving van around.


Batman/Superman #20


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Greg Pak | Art by Ardian Syaf

Dave: The holidays are a lot different when you invite Batman over for dinner.

Dog: “MY Grandma makes uncomfortably racist remarks about the ‘dark meat’ at Thanksgiving dinner, so you’re … actually, you’re pretty okay, now that I think about. Sorry for the massive cranial contusions.”

Nick: That’s a pretty aggressive ‘stranger danger’ technique, Mr. Wayne.

John: I always knew Batman was a Sith.


Lady Demon #3


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Aaron Gillespie | Art by Mirka Andolfo

Dave: They really are letting the fungal commercials get away with more these days.

Dog: His doctor told him not to sleep with his contacts in…

Nick: Looks like someone finally released a Sean Hannity sex tape.


Sidekick #10


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written
J. Michael Straczynski and Art by Tom Mandrake

Dave: Exploding Armstrong wasn’t as big of a seller as Stretch Armstrong, but that’s partly due to all the fingers children lost after “playing” with them.

Nick: Wow—eyeballs are getting the short end of the stick this week.

Dog: And every week! Might as well just rename this column “Eyeballs A-Poppin’.” More projectile peepers per page than any other site on the ‘net!


East of West #18


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Jonathan Hickman | Art by Nick Dragotta

Dave: Some tumors just want to be loved.

John: Cuddle: codeword for ‘do you want to die, little balloon?’

Dog: After people, hamsters will gorge on our remains and become the dominant megafauna, deterring all predators with their mass and ADORABLE WITTLE FACES SQEEEEEE!


Princess Leia #2


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Mark Waid | Art by Terry Dodson

Dave: New Star Wars comics are integrating the prequels, which immediately makes me wonder…did Leia ever get it on with a Gungan?

Nick: I just hope it means we get to watch Jar Jar die an agonizing death at some point.

John: The real Jar Jar did die in Phantom Menace. He never made it through the Core. The Jar Jar after is really just a body double. #StarWarsConspiracy


Action Comics #40


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Greg Pak | Art by Aaron Kudor

Dave: I’d love to see Jason Momoa with this version of the Aquaman costume, complete with a fishbowl on his head.

Nick: I have a sweater that looks like Aquaman’s shirt.

John: Bizarro needs to lay off the Marlboro Reds. Man his teeth are yellow. How many puffs does it take to create a hole in his throat?

Dog: Beatnik hobo Superman thinks they’re all crazy.


Sons of Anarchy #19


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Ryan Ferrier | Art by Matías Bergara

Nick: Next Panel: A giant mole saunters up and whispers “I can make that happen if you’re down…”

Dave: So you’re saying if we get past the fist whack level we get to the “fun” whackin?

John: We are still waiting on the third and fourth member to make this a party and then the real *wink* whackin’ can begin.

Dog: “Everyone put your keys in the bowl! Preferably not Aquaman’s!”


Manhattan Projects: The Sun Beyond the Stars #1


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Jonathan Hickman | Art by Nick Pitarra

Dave: The last recorded image of someone using the saying, “boom goes the dynamite!”

Nick: The eyeballs survived that? Seriously?

Dog: We feature only the most indestructible orbs on “Eyeballs a Poppin’”! All eyeballs guaranteed at tensile strengths of 3,000 psi or higher!

John: All creatures must have one or two eyes. Three is unacceptable.


Amazing Spider-Man #16


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Dan Slott | Art by Humberto Ramos

John: That’s some tough love…

Dave: I had a psychologist who used this brand of understanding. It worked, but the finisher was always the hardest part of our sessions.

Dog: The terrible truth of PETA, brought to light.


Spread #6


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Justin Jordan | Art by
Felipe Sobreiro

Dave: The baby might not be touched, but now it’s filled with nightmares.

Dog: The blood really clashes with his lavender shirt and golden bolo tie. But then again, anything would.

Nick: At least one of the bad guy’s eyeballs made it.

John: The no look stab to Jordan and…it’s good! Slam dunk!


Plunder #2


Panels in Poor Taste: 3/20/2015 – Eyeballs a Poppin'
Written by Swifty Lang | Art by Skuds McKinley

Dave: Market researchers decided the Taco Bell buffet was changing their customers behavior a bit too much. “Sticking to horse meat,” they mumbled, exiting the lab.

Nick: I once partook in a Kentucky Fried Chicken buffet, and I can promise you gory aftermath is still completely worth it.

John: This is what happens when you breed with parasitic aliens or in Nick’s case eating at KFC.

Dog: How’d that drippy, non-poppin’ eyeball sneak on here? Someone call quality control!

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