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#AlternativeFacts: Rob Liefeld to Write/Draw Red Tool Series for DC this March

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#AlternativeFacts: Rob Liefeld to Write/Draw Red Tool Series for DC this March

AiPT! Exclusive Scoop: Red Tool, the DC character that’s a parody of a Marvel character that’s parodying a DC character, is getting his own series this February. And guess who’s writing and illustrating the entire six-issue run? A person that’s no stranger to analogues: Rob Liefeld.

The 49-year-old co-creator of Marvel Comics’ popular Deadpool character (a well-known analogue of DC Comics’ Deathstroke) is poring over a pair of books, “On Syncretism and Roman Mythology: You Too Can Borrow the Right Way” and “What’s Good Enough for Galileo,” when AiPT! happened upon him in Angel’s Cabaret topless bar in Anaheim.

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“I mean, yeah, maybe Deadpool ‘adopted’ certain elements of Deathstroke,” he said, gesticulating quotation marks with his fingers when asked about the influence of the Merc with a Mouth’s creation, “But if you ask me, and anybody else worth their salt for that matter, I improved on the whole darn concept forty-fold. I mean, do you see Deathjoke with a record-breaking, R-rated movie under his belt? Didn’t think so.”

“That’s why I’m very grateful that DC has given me free reign over The Tool Man,” Liefeld continued. “Palmiotti and Conner,” he said of Red Tool creators Jimmy Palmiotti and Amanda Conner, “are fine with it obviously. Why wouldn’t they be? They kinda owe me considering Red Tool is based on my creation anyways. Funny enough, they both called me up after the announcement saying ‘Rob, thank you for being the visionary behind Deadpool and thank you so much for letting us try to rip off your trailblazing success with Red Tool and Bloodwulf was amazing too’.”

“Anyways, yeah. Free control. I won’t mention any names because I’m not petty, but there won’t be any pesky, nut-hugging editors COUGHthatdumbbastardBrevoortCOUGH all up in my bidness where they don’t belong. [DC], they’ve put all their faith in me, man. What a radical, euphoric feeling, you know? It’s just like the ’90s all over again — everything’s coming up Liefeld!”

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Liefeld didn’t hesitate to mention newcomer Dick Jankovic, who would share plotting duties with him.

“What I said about Fabian, that wasn’t right of me” he says, referring to past comments about Deadpool co-creator Fabian Nicieza. “That’s why I’ve hired an actual janitor to ride my coattails this time!”

Jankovic, an actual custodian from the Anaheim area, has no prior comic book credentials.

“After Dick and I saw how that fight went down between the Joker and Tool in Harley Quinn #12, we knew it was time for Red Tool to step it up and get his own series,” Liefeld explained. “I mean, you don’t just whip the Joker’s ass and then fade away into obscurity. It’s time to step up into the big leagues, bruh. And Rob Liefeld and Dicky Jankovic are gonna be the ones taking you there!”

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When asked if he would further explore the burgeoning romance between Red Tool and Harley from the Harley Quinn ongoing series where he first appeared, Liefeld shook his head and laughed. “Do I look like f-----g Nicholas Sparks to you, man? I can tell you this, though, in issue #1, there’s this kick-ass splash page where Red Tool straight MacGyvers two twelve-inch-pipe wrenches and a length of Grade 120 steel chain together and then he goes…”

At this point, Rob made a series of helicopter-rotor noises, reached into an oversized pouch on his hip, produced a 4-inch adjustable wrench from it and spun it repeatedly over his head.

“Then, in issue 2, he fights,” he paused for dramatic effect and then nodded incessantly, “Yup, who else but Deathstroke? Talk about coming full circle. Who’s the counterfeit one now, bitch? I dunno man, you’re gonna see anvils dropping on people’s heads and s--t; Red Tool’s gonna be like Wile E. Coyote — if Wile E. Coyote beat the Roadrunner’s ass all day, that is.”

When asked to comment, co-scripter Jankovic had only this to say, through his “Twitter spokesbruh:” “fam, it’s gonna be lit i promise u”

DC’s Red Tool #1 is slated for a mid-March release.

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