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Is It Any Good? ‘Crank 2: High Voltage’

If I could score it lower, I would.

Repulsive, inane, numbing, misogynistic, homophobic…. these are just some adjectives that can be used to describe this “film”. I saw Crank years ago and remembered it being absolutely God awful and disgusting. I didn’t think I could hate a film more until I saw Crank 2: High Voltage.

I don’t even know where to begin with this slimy piece of garbage. There is no plot; all Crank 2: High Voltage is is an excuse for Jason Statham to run around killing people, have public sex before tossing the girl to the trash, and make fun of gay people. Some say this film is “fun”… I’m scared to find out what else those people think is fun.

First off, let’s just be very clear… Crank 2: High Voltage is AGGRESSIVELY misogynistic and homophobic, that’s not me being a “snowflake”… it just is. Every single female in this is either a stripper or a hooker or simply there to get naked and maybe get shot in a gunfight…. fun right?! Yeah not so much.

Amy Smart’s character’s ONLY purpose is to be there to have sex with Jason Statham… oh and then get tossed aside and publicly humiliated for it. I’m honestly really baffled and disappointed in the fact that Amy Smart looked at this and said yeah sure sign me up! This is embarrassing… really embarrassing.

There is also quite a lot of uses of “f****t” and “homo” and one character is violently thrown out of a car for laughs because he has the “gay condition”. I mean… is this funny? I don’t know who wrote Crank 2: High Voltage but I hope and pray they never receive any work again ever. From watching this you would honestly think a group of mean spirited 12 year old boys were the writers.

Is It Any Good? 'Crank 2: High Voltage'
Jason Statham

The actual script – if you’d like to be kind and call it that – is nothing but men cursing at one another. The dialogue is supposed to be funny I guess but it’s really just stupid and a lot of times, offensive just for the hell of it. Like I said, imagine a film where everyone runs around yelling things that degenerate teenage boys would say… that is this script exactly.

But this film doesn’t really care about plot or writing, no of course not! All this film wants to do is show you ridiculous video game style scenes of Statham killing bad guys in the grossest way possible and treating women like crap. These are the lofty goals of Crank 2: High Voltage.

But here’s the thing… even if I could forget about all the misogyny and homophobia and just accept this as a mindless action film… I’d still hate it! I would still hate this because it can’t even give the audience fun exciting action. The fight scenes aren’t exciting or thrilling, they’re jumpy and frenetic and just disgusting. There are so many great fun action thrillers out there, why would I want to watch action that’s basically a crappy video game?

(And I’m sorry but what exactly is so fun and thrilling about seeing gangsters get shot to the point they’re guts are LITERALLY falling out? That’s not fun, it’s just sickening.)

Speaking of sickening, this film also loves to get up close and personal in grueling operation scenes where internal organs are being taken out. Again I ask… is this fun?? I actually do enjoy Jason Statham in a good many of his other films and truth be told I’ve had a big crush on him for forever but I have no clue why he or anyone would want to star in something like this. I would be offended simply by being offered this crud. There is absolutely NOTHING in this film that’s good or entertaining. I sat with either a scowl or a grossed out expression on my face throughout.

Is It Any Good? 'Crank 2: High Voltage'

Crank 2: High Voltage is not fun or exciting or funny or entertaining in any way. Nope, instead this is wildly sexist and homophobic, stupid, unfunny, shoddily edited, and just flat out embarrassing for everyone involved.

See this brutal British comedy for free on iTunes

crank 2
Is It Any Good? ‘Crank 2: High Voltage’
Is it good?
Crank 2: High Voltage just might the worst film I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. This seems like it was written by mean middle school boys who just wanted to be sexist and homophobic and gross and ultraviolent for no reason.
Reader Rating1 Votes
0.1
NOTHING!
Rampant sexism and homophobia
Unbelievably stupid script that is both brainless and devoid of entertainment
Shoddy video game style action
Bizarre gross attempts at comedy that are unfunny
Disgusting gore and carnage for no reason
1
Poor

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