Last night on AEW Dynamite, Chuck Taylor and Trent of the Best Friends took on Santana and Ortiz in a Parking Lot Fight to finally settle the score over Trent’s mom’s van. Their match was the main event of the night.
It’s important to note that AEW’s Tag Team titles weren’t involved, the #1 contender spot wasn’t at stake, and this wasn’t a match that had been hyped up for weeks for one of AEW’s pay-per-view events. The match was given 15 minutes — not short, but certainly not particularly long either. So, all in all, going into the main event last night I was excited because I very much enjoy the antics of these two teams and the hilarious story behind their feud, but I never expected to witness what I did.
Quite simply, Chuck Taylor, Trent, Santana, and Ortiz put on the greatest parking lot match in the history of wrestling. I mean that with no exaggeration or hyperbole and I rewatched the match again this morning to ensure what I saw was as good as I thought it was last night.
Before we move on, I’ll offer you my one and only warning: I’m basically going to break down and discuss the entire match, so that means there’s a lot of spoilers. DO NOT continue reading this if you haven’t watched the match yet. You will be spoiling one of the best matches on Dynamite ever, as well as what is surely going to go down in wrestling history as one of the best parking lot fights ever put on.
Alright, let’s get it on!
Leading up to the match, I was kind of irked at AEW. This episode of Dynamite was more or less fantastic top to bottom, but it felt like there were a lot more commercials than usual. Apparently it wasn’t just me, as I saw a bunch of folks complaining about it on Twitter. Turns out, this was deliberate.
No commercials in this Parking Lot Fight tonight btw. Let’s fight on #AEWDynamite !
— Tony Khan (@TonyKhan) September 17, 2020
This alone should have been a hint that something special was going to happen, but I admittedly didn’t think much of it. Silly me.
Before we get to the match itself, I think my favorite thing about the entire feud between these two tag teams is the fact that it centers around the fact that Santana and Ortiz wrecked Trent’s mom’s van. And the reason the van is even involved is because Trent and Chucky T. legitimately arrived in Trent’s mom’s van for their ring entrance at Fyter Fest night one. Easily one of the funniest and most unique wrestling entrances I’ve ever seen.
As the match was starting, the commentary team seemed to have the same thoughts:
“You have to remember Trent and Chuck are fighting for the honor of Trent’s mom, Sue.” – Excalibur
“Oh yeah, that raises the stakes.” – JR
To help set the stage for you, the teams fought within a ring of various cars and trucks and it was basically hardcore rules. There were also a variety of AEW in-ring performers and random individuals among the gaps between the cars, losing their minds.
So first off, hats off to Santa and Ortiz for showing up in Dead Presidents face paint. I don’t see any sort of correlation or reason behind why they did this other than the fact that it looked freaking badass, and that’s reason enough.
AEW
Once the match started, the two teams quickly got into it and the Best Friends gained an early upper hand. Trent laid Ortiz on top of a car engine and repeatedly slammed the hood down on him, which was bad enough, but then Chuck Taylor jumped off the roof of the car and delivered a senton to the top of the hood while Ortiz was still trapped underneath. And then, if that somehow wasn’t enough, out of nowhere Trent delivered a huge sit-out senton.
At this point we’re maybe two minutes into that match and we’ve already been shown a sequence of events that no one has ever seen before in a parking lot match. Just insanely brutal to watch and a hell of a lot of fun.
Ughughughugh!
This was followed by the Best Friends hitting Santana and Ortiz with 2×4. Tony Schiavone asked his fellow commentators how thick the wood was, to which JR replied, “I don’t know, Tim the Toolman, I can’t tell from here.” Comedy gold for those of us who grew up in the ’90s.
Santana started to turn the tide using a nightstick that he hid under the rim of one of the cars before the match. After brutalizing Trent’s back, Santana positioned him under the tailgate of the truck and hit him with a catapult into the tailgate. Another simple move that was creative and also incredibly damaging.
https://twitter.com/AEWonTNT/status/1306410702458900481
Ortiz added some antics by throwing a sledgehammer at Chucky T., barely missing crushing his foe’s skull, and getting it perfectly lodged in the windshield of one of the cars. That very same car then saw Santana deliver a suplex to Taylor on the roof, which shattered the back window, and then Ortiz out of nowhere delivered a frog splash by jumping off the hood of the truck that was next to the car that Taylor was laid out on the hood of. To top this sequence off, referee Rick Knox counted to three on the trunk of Taylor’s car, with each count causing the shattered glass of the back window to bounce.
At this point, I’m thoroughly convinced that this match is one of the best of its kind that I’ve ever witnessed. Things couldn’t possibly get crazier from here, right? Wrong. So very delightfully wrong.
https://twitter.com/AEWonTNT/status/1306412006824579072
As Ortiz and Trent climbed onto the roof of yet another car, Ortiz delivered a lowblow and then power bombed Trent onto the roof of the car. Bad enough on its own, but after that, Santana and Ortiz picked Trent up, held him high above their shoulders and power bombed him again, but this time onto the same car’s windshield, which shattered it and absolutely shredded Trent’s back. It was an absolutely disgusting spot, and I loved it.
“The epidermis ripped right through the glass!” – JR
God damn right it did, JR.
At this point, more or less the entire in-person audience was disturbed by what they just witnessed, with lots of hands on heads and mouths agape, but people were also losing their f*cking minds over how incredibly badass this match was. It was more or less the same situation on the Zoom call with my friends that I was watching with.
“I’ve seen crazy things JR, you and I both, this has to be one of the craziest we’ve seen.” – Tony Schiavone
“This is the most amazing Street Fight I can remember calling in my career.” – JR
If this isn’t high praise, I don’t know what is.
At this point, it looked like Best Friends were pretty much done for. Santana was raining haymakers down on Chuck Taylor, who was propped up against the bumper of one of the cars, and then he proceeded to pick up a steel pipe and begin whacking it on the concrete, all the while directing a knowingly evil smile at Taylor, who looked like he’s about to pass out. Somehow, Taylor managed to raise a shaking hand and begun weakly pressing a button on a car key remote. Slowly, the trunk behind Taylor’s head opened, and out popped Orange f*cking Cassidy. Freshly Squeezed took advantage of Santana’s shock to deliver the Orange Punch with a chain wrapped around his fist. Queue everyone watching popping as hard as possible.
.@orangecassidy OUTTA NOWHERE #AEWDynamite pic.twitter.com/MFKB2P9XRj
— All Elite Wrestling on TNT (@AEWonTNT) September 17, 2020
The entire sequence reminded me of the scene at the end of Saving Private Ryan where Captain Miller is wounded, propped up against a motorcycle and vainly shooting his pistol at an oncoming tank that’s about to crush him, when suddenly the tank blows up and we realize that it wasn’t Miller’s pistol that did the job, but a P51 tank buster that flew in out of nowhere at the last possible moment. Orange Cassidy is the P51 tank buster to Chuck Taylor’s Captain Miller.
So following this amazing save by Orange Cassidy, Chuck Taylor delivered a scary piledriver to Santana on the hood of a car and appears to slip while doing so. This is immediately followed by Trent jumping off of the toolbox in the bed of a truck onto a piece of plywood to deliver his finisher to Ortiz, earning Best Friends the 3 count and ending what is easily the best parking lot style brawl that I have ever seen in wrestling, period.
There was no other way to end this episode of Dynamite and this match than by having Trent’s mom Sue picking up the boys in her van. But somehow Sue found a way: flipping Santana and Ortiz the bird.
This is what you get for f*cking with my van.
I said it at the start of the article, and I’ll say it again now: Chuck Taylor, Trent, Santana, and Ortiz put on the greatest parking lot match in the history of wrestling. This match was an instant classic and easily the best match of this style that I’ve ever witnessed. And it wasn’t because of the blood, broken glass, and insane spots, it was because of the creativity and innovation that these two tag teams put on display.
Quite frankly, last night on Dynamite we saw a rare and special moment happen in the world of wrestling. We saw history being made. People are going to be talking about this match for years to come and I’m damn glad I got to witness it.
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