Hawkeye vs. Deadpool #1
Written Gerry Duggan | Art by Mateo Lolli
Dave: Is it ever okay to dress up as someone who was assassinated?
Dog: I’m not giving up my William McKinley ascot, Dave.
Written Michael Alan Nelson | Art by Dan Mora
Dave: A really bad liposuction I think.
John: Really burning the fat away.
Dog: Grandma, I said I’m sorry I was never an altar boy. But in hindsight, don’t you think that was the right decision?
68: Homefront #2
Written by Mark Kidwell | Art by Kyle Charles
Dave: Zombies doing chicken impressions are so cute!
Dog: You’d think the Fonz could just bring the zombie back to life by whacking it on the side.
Black Market #4
Written Frank J. Barbiere | Art by Victor Santos
Dave: What exactly makes that sound in the real world?
Dog: Ketchup, when it comes out of the bottle too fast.
Written Robert Napton | Art by Christian Dibari
Dave: Oh no, Quinn’s head fell off again! I knew allowing Crash Test Dummies to live and breathe was a bad idea.
Dog: The world has lost a fashion icon. Not just anyone can pull off a trucker hat with a disco ball-patterned jacket.
Written Mark Miller | Art by Carlos Granda
Dave: Face Off 3: Carnivale Edition!
Greg: Clowns are such easy fodder for horror. I mean, is there anyone left in the world that genuinely likes clowns? Actual clowns, put your hands down.
Manhattan Projects #24
Written Jonathan Hickman | Art by Nick Dragotta
Dave: Jackie Kennedy loves the new liquid center.
John: How many licks does it take to get the center of a Tootsie Brain?
Greg: I dunno man, usually when I’m eating Tootsie Brains, I get to a certain point where I just can’t wait to stop licking and straight up bite into the thing.
Dog: Forget the gore, I’m more interested in her pendulous uvula.